Bye bye dreams.

I'm still sad. I'm disappointed. I'm angry. I hate it. I really hate this feeling. I hate feeling this way.

I felt like throwing away ALL my crime novels. Seeing those novels made me even sadder just thinking that I couldn't get my desired course in UKM. I have secretly dreamed of taking forensics in UKM ever since I was in secondary schools. I don't really discuss about this neither with my family and friends.

What made me so damn angry and disappointed is that it took me years to accept the fact that once I graduated from UKM in forensics (as if) I will be a police/cop. Only after I posted about my dreams here, then I realized becoming a police would not be so bad anyway. I finally accept that fact. But now.............I really hate myself for accepting it.

Before this day comes, I have been imagining myself chasing after criminals, solving cases, working in lab experimenting the evidences etc. But imagination is not a good match with reality. Fact of life.

I worked hard for Semester 2 trying to increase my pointer.
So let me be honest out here. My overall pointer is 3.67 and I got Biotechnology in Unimas (one of my desired course) but I COULD NOT get myself into forensics UKM.

Let me tell you one amazing story of how UPU manage all this. I have a friend whose pointer dropped in Semester 2 but her overall pointer is 3.7 something as she got good pointer in Semester 1 and she got herself  a place in medic in UKM. Isn't her pointer and mine not so much of a difference? But why all of this happened?!

This sucks.
This feeling sucks.

My dream is shattering

The result day is today. I have just checked my result.

I am happy I got offered to Unimas but I always dream of UKM - Forensics. That's my dream and that was my dream.




Sadness overload. T____________________T

Dreams(?)

Updating second phase of UPU reached it's deadline yesterday. I hope I would get the course that I honestly want.

Forensic Science.

How I get myself passionate about this course?

Well, it all started with reading crime based novels. Every time I go to a bookstore, MPH for example, I will always look for the word 'death' or 'kill' when I read the synopsis, book covers with thrilling look and title that gives me the mysterious aura. Out of all the books that I bought and read, 'Through Violet Eyes' is my favourite.

Synopsis:

 In a world where the dead can testify against the living, someone is getting away with murder. Because to every generation are born a select few souls with violet-colored eyes, and the ability to channel the dead. Both rare and precious—and rigidly controlled by a society that craves their services—these Violets perform a number of different duties. The most fortunate increase the world's cultural heritage by channeling the still-creative spirits of famous dead artists and musicians. The least fortunate aid the police and the law courts, catching criminals by interviewing the deceased victims of violent crime.

But now the Violets themselves have become the target of a brutal serial murderer—a murderer who had learned how to mask his or her identity even from the victims. Can the FBI, aided by a Violet so scared of death that she is afraid to live, uncover the criminal in time? Or must more of her race be dispatched to the realm that has haunted them all since childhood?

There are sequels to this book.

With Red Hands

From Black Rooms

In Golden Blood

I went to MPH lots of time to find these sequels but I could not find any. Then, it means that these books are only available in Kinokuniya. (my own conclusion)
When I stayed with my grandparents in Putrajaya, I started to like crime shows. That was because they had channel 732, CI Crime&Investigation. That channel is pack with lots and lots of crime series from all over the world. Now I'm not staying in Putrajaya with them, I couldn't watch it. Sad :(
But then I found out in National Geographic, they have this show called 'Forensic First'. It depicts how crime technology had evolved. Pretty interesting.

Then I began watching CSI to ease my boredom and most importantly to keep my passion going on and on.

That was briefly how I like this course so much. I applied to UKM for this course,Bachelor of Forensic Science.

Unfortunately, when I did research about forensic science in Malaysia, some say that forensic science graduate must become a police first. Now where did I read it from? Wait.

Here's one. And another one here.

Reading this, it automatically put me down. Not because I don't want to be a police. But the qualifications. Qualifications put me down bunch of time. I hate you.

I think interest should be put first, then qualifications come in. I mean, take this for example, someone may qualify to be, say a doctor, but is that his/her interest? He/She may be forced by their parents to take that course. Now when this happen, what do people with so much passion would feel when they are not chosen for the course they really love just because they don't fit the qualifications?

Something need to be fixed here.

final sem result #2

Remember I said my sem 2 result would come out on the 5th of June? Well, it was postponed to today. Checked my result.

I'm just thankful to God that I improved even if it's not 4.0 but it was much better than I expected I would get.

Thank you also to my Biology lecturer, Mr Tee. Adeline and I  got scolded by him few times but I thought it was a blessing. I never thought I would say this but I LOVE BIO thanks to Mr Tee. I feel thankful to my lecturers in Sem 2 for their hard work. And for mine too. I showed up in MP a lot more than when I was in Sem 1.

I think what people say is true. If you have a close bond with your teacher and you respect them, whatever they teach you or do to you will be a blessing for you. The power of respect. Lol I think Sir Ding should lecture about 'respect' too haha. I miss him so much. I miss all of my lecturers throughout my life in KML.

BP5T27 with lecturers, lecture (mostly).

From top to bottom with Sir Ding (Math lecture), Sir Farid (Chemistry tutorial), Miss Tah (Chemistry lecture) & Sir Pek (Physic lecture and tutorial).

We ONLY did not take picture with Mr Tee. Scared. Nobody asked to take a picture with him during his last lecture. But it's ok tho. Just hearing him wishing us the best luck is more than enough.

final sem result

Tomorrow.
A day which will decide my future.
Freaking 5th June 2013.

PSPM RESULT OHMYGOODNESSGOODLORDHOPEFULLYTHERESULTISGOOD 0__0

My PSPM Sem 1 result wasn't very satisfying. I got more than 3.0 pointer. I wished to get 4.0 or 3.9 at least but it was still a very big gap to my pointer. With that, I came to my realisation that I SHOULD'VE studied EARLIER, in the beginning. But there's no point of regretting when clearly it was because I was lazy to study, copying others' tutorials and lab reports. And most importantly, time only moves forward. :(

Good luck to me and KMLians 2012/2013 for the deadly tomorrow.

Memorable memories to remember (y)

Alright so I have just finished my One-Year Matriculation Programme in Labuan. I'm finally home :D Weeeeeeee. To be perfectly honest, before I came to Labuan, I used to have this thought to myself. "I will NEVER be close to anyone in Labuan except for schoolmates." But words aren't powerful. A year there has made myself closely bonded to the people there. Classmates and lecturers especially. Here are some of my memorable moments in KML.

1) Moral Sketch Competition

 So we had this sketch competition on the 7th of March. Our class performed 'Mulan'. And the best part was our class was the only class that did not combine with other classes PLUS not importing other people from other classes. We rock ain't we? Haha. Anyways, here were the lists of players and characters.

• Ling as Mulan
• John as Mulan's father & musician
• Lydia (me) as Mulan's mother
• Carlton as General Lee (whom will be married to Mulan) & Villager 1 & musician & singer
• Andrew as Commander & the innocent guy
• Adeline as ...i have no idea what it is called but she was the person who read the King's command while riding a horse
• Chin as Adeline's assistant & singer
• Alvin as Raja Han Sious & villager 2 & musician
• Bija as bad guy 1 & pembawa tilam 1 & tentera RHS 1
• Chu as bad guy 2 & pembawa tilam 2 & tentera RHS 2
• Marsha as bad guy 3 & tentera RHS 3 & General's daughter
• Sonia as bad guy 4 & tentera RHS 4
• Michelle as narrator

But overall, all of us played as the army except for John and I because John had to play the erhu while I had no time to change. We received a lot of positive feedback from the audience. But too bad we did not win. And it did not matter to all of us participating in this sketch because we learn a lot of moral values from it. Winning is not everything. ;) My friend had the video of us performing but I haven't got it from her.

2) Malam Dinamika

10 people from our class went for the dinner on the 23rd of March. It was one of my memorable moments with my classmates even if there weren't all of us attending. I would say it was fun because it's my first time buying dress online teehee and my first time putting on a makeup. I never had the chance to put it on even though I went to tons of dinner before during my St Teresa's time mainly because I had this perspective "meh, it's all girls. no need to dress up so nicely." Malam Dinamika was way different. Different in a lot of aspects. Well to summarise it all, here are some of the pictures. ONE picture tells a THOUSAND words, indescribable.

3) Jamuan Sir Farid

Our class had a little meal/game feast at Sir Farid's house on the 6th of April. I came early with Michelle then we met John on the way. He asked us to sign in this pink paper, something like a 'Thank You' note for Sir Farid. Sir Farid's house is at Blok E, third floor. We went upstairs and saw Hanafi there who happened to come extremely early. It was around 2.50pm when four of us arrived at his house. Sir then asked us to take care of his house while he went out to buy some ice and chicken. Well, guess he were running out of ice and chicken since before our class' meal with him, he had meals with his other classes. Then slowly, few of our classmates came in. We played with Sir's gym equipment, punching bag and the most exciting one, his PS3. Goddammit it was fun. 

 Us playing with Sir's PS3. He had PS3, Xbox, nintendo and even cosplay costume.

Sir showing his nintendo.

 

Hanafi wearing the cosplay costume with Raid taking his picture and John at the side eating.

 When the small party almost come to an end, we took picture with Sir Farid. We stayed in his house for like 2 hours or maybe more. From 3 something until 5 something in the evening. Damn long that Sir kept on asking us when we would be going back to the dorm. But none of us moved even one bit. Too addicted with the game maybe.

 

4) Manjarasa

Our class decided to go on an outing to Manjarasa on 10th of April, a floating steamboat restaurant in Labuan. But in order to go there, we need letters and signatures from guardian, KJPP and HEP/PPHEP because the outing would be at night since we were going for a steamboat.

These were the pictures taken at the rooftop of Manjarasa (which I put in gif file) so it would look animated.

Our table! Left to right: Me, Adeline & Ling.

If you noticed, we didn't have much soup because we didn't touched them. The veges have been boiled inside the chicken soup base for hours. And we were the QUEENS of ze night :D

Raid's table consisting of himself, Amir, Salleh and Hanafi tried to eat as much as ours. But too bad their appetite (and stomach) were not as huge as ours that night. Self-praising \m/ :P

What is wrong with youphone?!

To get started, I just want to say that I got totally hooked up with this.
Isn't he the cutest thing alive in the whole planet? :D

alright. alright. stop drooling. *wipes mouth*



Anyway back to the real reason why I'm here.
I got really fed up with my phone. It's a bit hard for me to ask for a new phone. Many reasons to state but I just couldn't list it out.

I've been using this phone (what model it is, I can't say) for like a year. Well, I have to admit that due to my carelessness, this phone fell many times. Yes. MANY times. It got scratches in few areas. And maybe because of this, countless of charger have been bought and used but still none couldn't charge this phone fully. Not the charger's fault I supposed but maybe the battery have not worked as well as before.

And now, my phone's battery is 48%. Worse of worst, I have no charger to charge.
What a bummer.